what a ... um ... yeah.

what a birthday.

it's just been unremarkable in that decidedly MY family way.

We went out to do the traditional birthday-meal as a family thing at Olive Garden (and I don't think I ever want to go there again now.)

As soon as we arrive, Dad comes in, pulls Doug aside, and says: "I need to go home. I'll have the soup and salad."

And he leaves. Don't bother saying bye to the birthday girl, dad.

We spent the first half of the meal trying to figure out what was going on while constantly, neurotically watching the hall so we didn't get caught talking about him.

And I couldn't have any wine, either. (It would have pissed off my one remaining parent at the table.)

When he finally did come back, he walks in, puts his coat down, and leaves the room again. Not so much as a hello.

He spent the rest of the meal, after his second return, not talking to anyone, but me in my want-everything-to-be-normal mode kept trying to drap him into the conversation. (I can't talk to my mom about much besides clothes, sadly.)

I was very hurt that he walked out on this near-sacred family tradition on my birthday. That's all I'm going to remember about this particular birthday ... Dad just getting up and leaving.

Afterwards, he asked me what *I* wanted to do *next*. I WANTED to say "Anything that involves you STOPPING your goddamn immaturity and acting normal for my birthday!"

I just said "The mall is fine with me." I didn't want to go home right away, and i know the mall is a consumerist escape for my family. So we went.

And I mostly talked to my dad, and distracted him long enough to let Mom run and get some Powerball tickets without having to make a big fuss. (big jackpot tonight.) You see, if she had to tell Dad what she was doing he'd take it as an insult that he wasn't making enough money.

So the long and short of it is - it's MY birthday, but I'm still stuck playing FUCKING peacemaker. And doug wasn't helping much - he barely let me drag him out of bed. Thanks so much, everyone.

I did get a cute Pikachu/Togepi beanie, though. It is awesome.

It'll keep me smiling through this hell of a holiday.

Next year, I'm spending my birthday in Rhode Island and Boston. Screw this shit.