SimCompany is moving. We are relocating to become part of the SimParentCompany's campus.

Somehow, I have become a part of the funeral march of a videogame company I idolized just a year ago.

Can I just take this moment to say FUCKING FUCKETTY FUCK ASSWHORE BULLSHIT?

Thanks.

I cannot believe that I JUST finished unpacking from what was my bazillionth move in 2 years and yet we have to PACK EVERYTHING UP AGAIN.

The move is a short hop, if you consider moving from Connecticut to Pennsylvania a short hop. A minimum of 1.5 hours commute each way. There's no way we can manage that.

I suppose this is how the corporate world works. I know I'm lucky that I even HAVE this job. I know I'm lucky that I don't have a family and kids like half of the people that work here.

But that didn't stop me from crying tonight when I got home to see our pretty apartment complex, where we are all settled as adults, where I have been happier in these short months than I have been in my whole life - that just opened the floodgates.

I just want to be settled. Is that too much to ask?

They announced the news mostly unceremoniously today, and the company was pissed. "So, can you explain to me how taking 400 of us and moving us away from our homes, family, and friends HELPS SimParentCompany's goal of becoming the #1 People Company?"

When people ask these questions point blank of executives - immediately after being informed of layoffs that same day - you know that takes a lot of balls and a lot of anger.

As for me, VA warned me a few hours beforehand about what was going to be announced. This didn't necessarily help things, as she made me promise not to tell Hunter. It certainly made it weird showing up to the meeting, knowing that they were going to announce something so contentious that we might lose as much as 20% of the company.

Apparently I gained some cred by asking our exec point blank in a meeting, "When we get to SimParentCompany, will we still be considered SimCompany, or just a group of people that happen to sit next to each other?" The answer: Complete avoidance. We're not going to be SimCompany anymore.

In the end, it doesn't matter to SimParentCompany who leaves and who doesn't. Welcome to the business world, Athena. We're just a brand now. Oh sure, they'll offer us relocation packages. In fact, I've heard some numbers going around - numbers so high that I could pretty much pay off my college loans with the extra money. But they're just bribing us to shut the fuck up and watch a company we care dearly about - SimCompany - die a slow death at the hands of SimParentCompany. To them, we're nothing more than a "brand" that will die out with the last SimSequel expansion pack.

And change happens fast. March 26th will be our first day working in the new space.

In the tumult, we barely noticed the people who "were inevitably laid off as part of the process." People like all of the wonderful sweet admin assistants who have been busting their ass for years. People like our Mastering Lab people and some of IT. And, most noticeably of all - a very high-profile layoff that probably shouldn't be made public yet -- but one that has placed even more responsibilities on Hunter's already overburdened shoulders.

So yes, I have my job. And I'll keep it. I'm not going to quit - not in this economy, it's not like I have a death wish or something. But the people who made this company what it was will slowly bleed away, whether it's because of other jobs or just the sadness of watching this once-respected company go the way of Westwood or Origin. And I still like what I do for the time being.

After the announcement, productivity was shot for the day. I myself went to my old boss's office bar and had a glass of Bailey's on the rocks to take the edge off of the day. Apparently, Hunter had 4 glasses of Bailey's.

After work, a good chunk of SimCompany folk went to the Whip, the nearby dive bar, to drown our sorrows. I got more Bailey's, a Smirnoff, a martini. I talked with old veterans, just sad to see where we have ended up, bitter that SimSequel's delay led to this chain of events. I talked to new folks like Alex, former lead designer of a now-cancelled project (though he hasn't been laid off.) VA, Destry, and Suzie showed up too. Once we were done at the Whip, we went for half-price margheritas and Mexican food. We might as well take advantage of the town while we can.

Goodbye, Crepes A Go-Go.

So Saturday begins our 4,000th apartment search. We already have some apartment showings scheduled in the South Bay. I'm just so emotionally exhausted of moving and packing and uprooting, regardless of what money is shoved into my hands to make it more bearable.

I just can't help feeling like this is all a mistake. Fuck forecasts and revenue - this company was something special.

I guess I'm glad my business cards came when they did. They'll probably be a collector's item, sooner rather than later.

But for now, it's time to go hug Hunter and cry.